I've been home now from the hospital for a week -but it feels like so long ago. It has been such a whirlwind of an experience.
Right now, my daughter is lying on my lap fast asleep. She is a mommy's girl. She immediately knows when it's me. However, she does love her daddy.
I tried putting her in her bassinet and she woke up and became fussy. I know she needs to get used to it but I can't help it when she looks up at me with those sweetest eyes. She's beautiful, and wonderful, and charming.
From day one, I've had a hard time parting from her. Even when it was for sleep. And then when I came home I would have a hard time leaving the room. I'm OK if someone wants to hold her for a little bit as long as they stay close- even the grandmas. I do miss when being pregnant she was with me every moment. So now there's a little separation anxiety.
The first few nights home, about eight o'clock when I would become very tired, I would start sobbing. Probably not what you think- it was about how in love I am, how she'll grow up too fast, how one day I'll have to part with her. Then all the worries of someone harming her, serious illness or injury, not being a good enough mom and the like.
Come Monday morning, I had one more sob fest and that's when I just had to give it up to God knowing that I couldn't carry such thoughts. Why worry?
So here are a few of my new favorite things:
- the way daddy adores his daughter
- how she snuggles into my neck
- that I can soothe her just by taking her into my arms
- her tiny little hands and feet
- the faces she makes while she sleeps
- her sneezes
- that I can see both Bryan and myself in her little features
- her big bright eyes
- how she stretches and the face she makes
- the snorting noises she makes when she's hungry
- her squeaks
- when she snores
- her leaky right eye
- that she can't get enough of mommy
I am blessed