Saturday, December 24, 2011

Sweet Baby Coos

I am currently in the hospital looking upon the sweet face of my second baby.
I'm in love.
She looks just like her older sister when she was born so I know she'll be just as beautiful. But most importantly is that she's here, her and I are both safe, and we are both bonding and falling more and more in love.
Baby V was born at 3:47 this am on Christmas Eve. After I struggled with the really bad make you wanna cry and scream contractions for a couple hours, after already dealing with contractions since the night before, I got an epidural while 5 cm dilated.
Thank the good Lord I did.
I was able to rest and relax letting my body become complete within only a couple hours. I was ready to push by about 3am. As with A, baby V's heartrate kept dropping, but after a I pushed with a contraction she had me move from side to side to get her heartrate back up.
By the time I hit my final push, the Doc had to do an episiotomy on myself and use the suction once on baby V. But I pushed with all I had and out came her head, then her body. It was almost surreal.
She had a BM in the womb so they had to take her right away to the warming table but I got her pretty quickly, getting to hold her skin-to-skin while the Doc stitched and cleaned me up.
7 lbs 3 oz and 20 inches long. Light brown hair and dark dark blue eyes.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

I can see why more women are having home births

I had my 40 week check-up today and since my doctor is on Christmas vacation I had to see another dr. A female dr. Don't get me wrong, I have a female family doctor that I see regularly who I actually really like and have been seeing for 8 years.
But my ob is a male doctor (Dr. B). I saw him when I was pregnant with A, continue to see him as my yearly ob, and see him now for this babe. He even delivered A so you can see why I prefer him over seeing another ob.
When I was 40 weeks with A, Dr. B was on call at the birthing center so I had to see someone else. I saw a female dr. She was rough, uncompassionate, and it kinda felt like she could care less especially when I told her that I just wasn't feeling right that day. It turned out I was actually in early labor but she dismissed it since I wasn't dilated past 1 centimeter. I cried and cried after my appointment with her.
Today was basically the same thing. Dr. B is out for Christmas so I had to see another female dr. I knew I wouldn't be dilated any more than 1 cm so I didn't plan on having her check me. I didn't need the stress or the pressure, let alone risking infection or something else for no reason.
So when the nurse gave me the thinned cotton sheet to cover myself I asked her if it was really necessary. I informed her that I knew I won't dilate until I go into labor so there was really no point. She said that since I'm 40 weeks that it's routine.
The dr. comes in, measures me and checks the babes heartbeat,meverything looks good. She confirms that I had a c-section before and am hoping for a vbac this time around, I told her yes. She then checks me to see if I'm dilated. It hurts. Like a son of a gun, mother of pearl, piece of firecracker. (And it seems like only the women hurt like this. I think she was trying to count my baby's toes!)
And, guess what. I'm not passed 1cm.
She then proceeds to tell me that they "generally don't like the moms to go pass 41 weeks" and Dr. B will probably talk to me about "a repeat c-section at next week's appointment but if things are looking good he may let me go another week with a series of stress tests that they'd like to perform blah blah blah..."
What the heck? Whatever happened to letting moms go 42 weeks before becoming concerned? Why the series of stress tests if me and my baby are looking good and fine? Why the casual talk of a repeat c-section especially if it's not necessary but for the fact that I may not go into labor when you want me to??
I don't need this stress and I don't need the pressure. I just want to carry my baby until God decides its time for her to come out. So unless I'm going to die or my baby is going to die I don't want to discuss a repeat c-section. I want to have my baby naturally and in our own time and I don't want to be forced to do something I don't want to do.

*steps off soapbox*

Friday, December 09, 2011

A new stage of life coming right up

Less than two weeks until my due date. Really? That's all? I mean, I realize that number isn't set and this babe could come earlier or cook for a while longer, it's just that it's crazy to think that I have tentatively two weeks left. Craziness.
I honestly think that I've kinda hurried this pregnancy along. Anxious for one milestone, then another, then another. And I've been so busy with A that I haven't just sat and focused on the reality that a new babe is really coming to join our family.
Life as we know it is nearing an end and a wonderful new chapter will be soon beginning. So scary. But I remember feeling this way before A arrived. Something new, different and exciting was gonna happen to our life as a couple and that was scary. Now we have a flow with the three of us and it's about to change.
Also, the reality of the birth is setting in. After an emergency c-section with A, I knew I really wanted a vbac if at all possible. It's hard to not feel disappointed in yourself for a c-section even if you did all you knew to do to get it right.
I don't know why I have the strong desire to have a vaginal birth other than that it's in my genetic makeup. But now that it's drawing near I'm becoming nervous. Nervous for all the what if's: uterine rupture and possibly dying or my baby dying, needing a repeat c-section and all the recovery that goes along with it, not being strong enough to do a vbac at all.
So insert September- Worrier Queen of all things to worry about, big or small, silly, or even non-existent.
I know this worry is legit, albeit small, and I also know there's nothing I can do about it but trust in God and go with the flow.
So with all the chaos throughout this pregnancy of life in general with a 3 year old, I took the time to stop and talk with the Babe last night. I won't say all that I discussed with her but I did tell her that I love her and that I'm ready and excited for her whenever she (and ultimately God) decides to come and greet us.
I'm sure it'll be a different but very good transition from a family of three to a family of four... Plus it'll be nice to finally reveal her name!

Saturday, December 03, 2011

My gramma is cooler than your grandma.

Welp, I failed at the November blogging but I was out of town all of thanksgiving weekend and then my gramma was here to deep clean my house. And oh my word does it look amazing!! It seriously hasn't been this clean in 5 months ever since I started becoming more and more tired from being pregnant. Did you know that a pregnant woman does the same work as a mountain climber? At least that's what I heard but I sure wouldn't doubt it.
But anyway, my gramma (who's awesome aside from cleaning my whole house) offered to come up here to help get ready for the new Babe. She L O V E S to clean and clean she did. So when we left for home after thanksgiving we brought my gramma home with us. And in five days my house was as spotless as though no one lived here! It seriously would have taken me 2 weeks to get it as clean as she did.
We also decided to rearrange the house (again) for the girls. Since we had moved A upstairs a few months ago it just hadn't worked out and she was back downstairs in her old nursery turned office. The room is tiny enough but add two desks and a toddlers bed and it's cramped!
Well, gramma made it happen. Aside from a few too heavy boxes and my desk, her room is back to a bedroom and is almost set for both girls. A's at least set up and we'll soon have the new Babe set up but we won't have to worry about it for a while.
And since she made the bedroom happen that also means she made the upstairs back into a work space/play area/hang out room. She deep cleaned every room except our bedroom (didn't have time for that one), having swept, mopped, shined, scrubbed, wiped, vacuumed, and dusted. I think we're ready!
I had been telling Bryan that I really needed two of me. Well, she was it! She's that energetic, selfless, second set of hands that I desperately needed. so, even though I know she won't See this:
Thank you Gramma!! You are such a blessing to me and my little family!!

Someday I hope to be closer to all of them. I miss them so I think that would just be glorious.

Oh, and this is how cute and in love my grandparents are.. When we met my grampa half way, he was outside of the car (in the rain) anxiously awaiting her. He had a huge grin on his face and flowers in the car. Hehe. He even called 2-3 times a day while she was here just to say hi! Oh my word. Too sweet.