Friday, February 09, 2007

Today's Story Time- (brought to you by the letter S)

So I have a couple of stories for you.
Even though they are from yesterday...

So first off-
Did you hear about the death of
Anna Nicole Smith?
Yesterday at 2ish.
They are doing an autopsy today-
So we'll see what exactly happened-
in spite of all the rumors going around.

Anyway,
Moving on...
But be forewarned-
This is a vent.

So last Sunday
Bryan and I went house hunting.
We found this house for sale but
it didn't have a sign.
I asked Bryan to look into it.

I looked online and fell
IN LOVE
with this house.
Beautiful,
Perfect
and a Steal.

So Wednesday when Bryan
called the realtor they told us it
it had sold just
twenty minutes before.

I cried.
I'm still praying that it isn't.


So yesterday I was on
my way to school.
Driving in town in the left lane
of two lane street,
there was a car in front of me
who was a little
brake happy.

So there she was
Ms. Brake Happy
tap-tap-tapping away-
Who wasn't happy if she wasn't going
exactly the speed limit.
I wasn't sure what was going on
so I slowed down as well.
Until she slammed on her brakes.

I saw there was a white car
coming the opposing direction
IN OUR LANE
wanting to turn.
I came within inches
of hitting
Ms. Brake Happy.
So I laid on my horn.
(not at Ms. Brake Happy
but at the idiot sitting in oncoming traffic)

People can not drive here.


So my brothers-in-law are
driving me mad.
The one getting married
won't help pay for anything
because
"he has no money."

But yet they manage to
scrounge up money
to go out to eat
spending $40 on dinner
$150 on comedians
or they go out and spend
$6 on a pint of ice cream.

SIX DOLLARS! For a PINT!

It doesn't help that they
get the most expensive things
because they don't
have any bills to pay-
yet.

Then both of the brothers will
come over
and eat all of our food!

For example:
I made two large loaves of
-chocolate chip banana bread-
on Wednesday.
They came over last night
(Thursday)
and this morning (Friday)
it was almost gone.
Not to mention uncovered so
whatever was left was
drying out.

And yet it's such a task to pick
up a gallon of milk
or share the food they've bought
for themselves.

poopy, stinky, lame, poopy boys-
I fart in your general dIrection!

Yeah that's right.
I went there

1 comment:

jordan said...

people make me uncomfortable. but not you. i heart you. did you know that? i really like banana/chocolate bread. i probably would have eaten it all, too. sorry. but i would have bought a gallon of milk and a carton of clementines in exchange. i'm all about fair trade.