Friday, December 09, 2011

A new stage of life coming right up

Less than two weeks until my due date. Really? That's all? I mean, I realize that number isn't set and this babe could come earlier or cook for a while longer, it's just that it's crazy to think that I have tentatively two weeks left. Craziness.
I honestly think that I've kinda hurried this pregnancy along. Anxious for one milestone, then another, then another. And I've been so busy with A that I haven't just sat and focused on the reality that a new babe is really coming to join our family.
Life as we know it is nearing an end and a wonderful new chapter will be soon beginning. So scary. But I remember feeling this way before A arrived. Something new, different and exciting was gonna happen to our life as a couple and that was scary. Now we have a flow with the three of us and it's about to change.
Also, the reality of the birth is setting in. After an emergency c-section with A, I knew I really wanted a vbac if at all possible. It's hard to not feel disappointed in yourself for a c-section even if you did all you knew to do to get it right.
I don't know why I have the strong desire to have a vaginal birth other than that it's in my genetic makeup. But now that it's drawing near I'm becoming nervous. Nervous for all the what if's: uterine rupture and possibly dying or my baby dying, needing a repeat c-section and all the recovery that goes along with it, not being strong enough to do a vbac at all.
So insert September- Worrier Queen of all things to worry about, big or small, silly, or even non-existent.
I know this worry is legit, albeit small, and I also know there's nothing I can do about it but trust in God and go with the flow.
So with all the chaos throughout this pregnancy of life in general with a 3 year old, I took the time to stop and talk with the Babe last night. I won't say all that I discussed with her but I did tell her that I love her and that I'm ready and excited for her whenever she (and ultimately God) decides to come and greet us.
I'm sure it'll be a different but very good transition from a family of three to a family of four... Plus it'll be nice to finally reveal her name!

2 comments:

  1. We all look forward to seeing the new stage of your life", after all your family in VV is a family for us! Thank you for bringing another "Forbes" to share and love.

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  2. Praying for you, dear September as your time comes for your new little girl to join you on the outside :)

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